The Best Christmas Present {CA}

If you read my last post then you know that at the beginning of this week we were looking forward to getting our consulate appointment confirmed which would give us a really good idea on travel dates. Our agency said we should hear by Tuesday, but that Monday was possible so of course I was praying for Monday, but when we hadn't heard anything by 3pm Monday I had all but resigned myself to Tuesday, but God had other plans...

At about 3:30pm I received a text from a family I met on one of my adoption groups who is adopting from China using the same agency we are and had their article 5 pick up the day before us. We found each other early last week and had been enduring the long TA wait together (which helped) and had celebrated the arrival of both of our TAs together on Friday. Over the weekend we speculated about CAs and travel dates and were both praying we would hear something on Monday. We had chatted online a few times on Monday and by afternoon were both thinking it would be Tuesday. Then late Monday afternoon I get a message from her asking if 'I'd gotten my call' and saying she was a little disappointed. I immediately replied, 'no, what?!," but before she could reply my phone rang - it was our agency.

Our agency coordinator started out by telling me that she had good news and bad news which, at that point, didn't surprise me - I just didn't know what the news was, and my heart sank. The good news was that they had our confirmed CA. The bad news was that it wasn't as soon as we had all hoped. I have to admit that my excitement at having the final piece of the puzzle in place was tempered by my disappointment that we would have to wait a little longer than we had hoped.

Once I had a little distance from the disappointment I was able to celebrate how close we are now! I can actually start finalizing plans now that we have dates and if you know me at all then you know that is a huge relief to me. I also went over in  my mind all the prayers that God has answered up to this point (instead of focusing on the prayers He didn't answer in the way I wanted - which is what I did too much of during our TA wait), and I came to the conclusion that God has given us the best Christmas present we could have asked for - the dates we get the blessing and privilege of meeting our son and bringing him home!

But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God. ~Galatians 4:4-7

Praying you all have a blessed Christmas!

If I'm Being Honest {TA}

If I'm being honest I've been struggling the last few weeks - a lot.

I did a post about waiting almost two weeks ago and things have been hard since then. We have been waiting on our travel approval (TA) from China since 12/3 which is the last piece of paper we need to move forward. I am on a couple of China adoption Facebook groups and they are while they are great in many ways and I have met some truly wonderful people, they have a major down side. You see, everyone posts their updates and stats on these groups so I knew that there were several other families with article 5 pick up (the step before TA) the same day and week as ours and that we all were waiting for TA. Well starting on the 9th and continuing through this past Wednesday all of them received TA - except for us. Talk about a blow to an already tender (barely holding on) heart! I cried. As the days stretch out with no news I cried some more, and by this past Thursday night I was cried out and had about given up hope that we would even get our TA by week's end.

The second week of our wait I had sent a few messages to close friends asking for prayer because I was having such a hard time and I was so vulnerable, and a dear friend (and fellow adoptive mom) sent me this text:

"Praying friend! I know the last leg can grow sooo weary! HANG on. Be reminded right now...Just as at the perfect moment Jesus was born in the most unlikely place, just as Moses went streaming down the river at JUST the right time, just as at JUST the right moment your sweet babies were ready to leave your womb---God will speak--say 'DONE' and you will get the  travel notice. Praying against every weapon formed against you--and claiming victory and redemption for that precious boy!! Love you!"

I needed this reminder so much and I needed it at just that moment! I read that text several times over the course of the week and it was such an encouragement! I am so blessed to have such amazing and supportive friends and I know several other friends were praying for me as well. All of the prayers were felt and so appreciated, but I dreaded facing another weekend with no TA and as Friday dawned I tried to prepare myself to accept the disappointment if God's plan was for us to wait some more. But God decided that Friday was just the right time to say 'done' and our TA arrived at our agency Friday afternoon! I was at Walmart when our agency called to tell me they had our TA and that they had already sent in the request for our CA (consulate appointment)!! I was so excited! We do have to wait until Monday or Tuesday for our  CA confirmation, but I am ok with that because this step takes a standard 1-2 business days which means that by Christmas we will have our travel dates!!!

This has been such a long journey and I can't even begin to get into all the emotions and what God has taught me through this, but I know it will ALL be worth it when our son is in our arms for the first time. Jason has been so amazing through all of this and never waivers (while I am wobbling all over the place), and there isn't anyone I'd rather be on this adventure with!! We are hoping to travel early to mid January, but it will depend on CA requests and availability. For now we are celebrating TA and being one step closer to meeting our little one!

As I Wait

I am doing a Good Morning Girls Advent study with three of my favorite friends and during my study on Friday's verses (Romans 15:12-13) I was looking at cross references for verse 12 and God brought me to these verses from Jeremiah 17:

5 Thus says the Lord:
“Cursed is the man who trusts in man
and makes flesh his strength,
whose heart turns away from the Lord.
6 He is like a shrub in the desert,
and shall not see any good come.
He shall dwell in the parched places of the wilderness,
in an uninhabited salt land.
7 “Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
whose trust is the Lord.
8 He is like a tree planted by water,
that sends out its roots by the stream,
and does not fear when heat comes,
for its leaves remain green,
and is not anxious in the year of drought,
for it does not cease to bear fruit."

 

As we are waiting on the last piece of adoption paperwork and praying that we can travel in January I needed this reminder that my there is no strength within my flesh (my strength comes from the Lord) and if I trust in Him (and not just IN him but my trust IS Him), I have no reason to fear or be anxious - He is in control and will work everything out according to His perfect plan.

 

As I wait I am choosing to focus on this special time of year and the true reason we celebrate CHRISTmas!
 

TA Wait Begins

There is that blasted word again - wait. I should be a professional at this by now, but waiting is definitely not my strong point. However, I have gotten better at waiting and since this is our last big wait of the adoption process I can't help but be excited and thankful. Our TA (travel approval) wait officially started today as our Article 5 paperwork was picked up at the US Consulate in Guangzhou and will hopefully arrive at the CCCWA tomorrow. Based on current timelines our TA is expected the week of December 16, but if I've learned anything about the adoption process its that there is really no predicting anything. Our TA is the last piece of paper we need before we can make our consulate appointment and travel arrangements, so now our big prayer is that we will get a super fast TA!

I can't believe we are finally at this point! Needless to say I have been a list making, errand running, supply buying machine the last few weeks and there is no end in sight just yet :)  But I am happy for all of it because it means we are another day closer to getting our son!

 

New Pics!

For your viewing pleasure this week when nothing is happening on the adoption front I present to you updated pictures of our little man!

 

Oh, my word! That is some serious cuteness and personality! I love him so much already!!

The Home Stretch

We are entering the home stretch of our adoption journey and although we still have some waiting to do, most of our paperwork is done (halleluiah) and we are getting so close!

After receiving our LOA and sending in our I800 we then had to wait for our I800 provisional approval which we received on 11/6. After granting us provisional approval USCIS sent our paperwork to the NVC (National Visa Center). The NVC replaced our original SIM number with a GUZ number and assigned our case to the appropriate US embassy (China). The NVC then cabled (electronically sent) our case and paperwork to the embassy (yesterday) and issued a letter (PDF) stating that they did so. NVC sent a copy of the PDF to us (today) and that was our cue to proceed with the next step which was forwarding the PDF to our agency and filling out the DS260 online (application for Justin's visa). Once they have the PDF our agency initiates our Article 5 drop off (this is when our agency's courier in China drops off our final paperwork at the embassy in China) which is scheduled for Monday.

Whew! So what could possibly be left you ask?! Well, we still have a few more steps :/  Our part of the paperwork is now mostly done except for applying for our visas which we will do in the next week or two. The remaining steps (which we have exactly zero control over) go like this:

1. Courier in China drops our Article 5 paperwork off at the embassy (and they give him a date to return to pick it up) - drop off scheduled for Monday 11/18

2. Courier picks Article 5 paperwork up at embassy and sends it to the CCCWA - approx. 12/3 or 12/4

3. The CCCWA processes the Article 5 and issues our TA (travel approval) - this step can take any where from 1 to 4 weeks with the average being about two weeks (please pray with us that ours will be in the 1-2 week range)

4. Once travel approval is received, our agency makes our consulate appointment, we make our travel arrangements, and then we go get our son!!!! (Our other prayer is that we will be able to travel before January 10 in order to miss Chinese New Year which would likely delay our travel until February.)

And there you have it in a nutshell!

So for now a little piece of my heart will be in China, but we are a little closer every day and for that we are thankful!

Praise the LORD. Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.  ~Psalm 106:1

New Blog Title & Pic

Check out my new blog title at the top (4 Potatoes) and the new pic in the right side bar!!

Introducing...

Our soon to be newest addition!!

Justin Li

We can't wait to meet this cutie and kiss those sweet cheeks!

Story Behind the Name

We have had the name Justin on our list since right after we started the adoption process. Jordan let us know early on that she would like our new baby to have a J name like her since we have two C names (apparently it doesn't count that both her parents have J names), so we said OK and started trying to find J names that we liked. Let me just tell you that when you limit your choices to one letter it is very difficult to come up with names, but I have always liked the name Justin and there was a special reason to use this name so it was the first one on the list followed by a few other J names.

Besides the fact that we just like the name Justin it was also the name of our dear friend who went to be with our heavenly Father much too soon. Jason met Justin at work in 1999 and they were the best of friends from that day on (their co-workers actually used to get them mixed up). They had lots of fun together both at work and on weekends. Justin always had a smile and was willing to help anyone with just about anything. Jason says that back then 'work' was more fun and at times it was like hanging out with friends. During the many late nights spent at the office their favorite topic to talk about was God. Jason and Justin often went running during their lunch break and would discuss  spiritual topics and whatever was going on in their lives at the time. When Justin passed away suddenly in early 2011 we were all devastated, but knowing that we will see him again one day has given us comfort, and we know he is watching over us from above.

Justin (left) and Jason

 

Name Origins/Meanings

Justin is a form of the New Testament name Justus and means just, upright, righteous.

Our little one's middle name, Li, is Chinese and is part of his original birth name. In Chinese Li means stand, found, establish.

A Prayer

For the little one waiting for us on the other side of the world.

We can't wait until you are in our arms!

 

One Step Closer

Today we received the hard copy of our LOA and I have never been so happy to see the FedEx truck in my driveway. Once we signed the letter to officially accept the match we made a copy of it and put the copy along with our completed I-800 and a few other papers in a FedEx envelope and promptly deposited it in the FedEx drop box.  It is now on its way to USCIS (and should arrive tomorrow) so we are one step closer to our little guy and we are making progress, but we still have more waiting to do (pray for me!).

On a positive note, an exciting part of receiving our LOA is that we can now send a care package to our little one! Because shipping from the US is expensive and getting through customs is slow we have decided to use Ann from RedThreadChina.com for our care package. She is based in China so she can get it to him much quicker and for less shipping. We are sending him a PJ care package and family photo album and I am so excited for him to get it.



Stay tuned for my next big post with his name and pictures!!

Finally! {Adoption Update}

It is here! The adoption update you (and we) have been waiting for since April! On September 24th our agency called and told us they had a referral for us. Our coordinator filled us in on the highlights of the file and then emailed the file to us. I opened the file like it was Christmas morning and there looking back at me were the cutest brown eyes.

I immediately called Jason and forwarded the file to him and then began my search for information. We are doing the China special needs program so all of the children in the program have some type of medical special need. I had never heard of the special need this little guy was born with and so I opened my trusty Google window and began an exhaustive search for info. I emailed a specialist and we had the file reviewed by an adoption clinic at Children's hospital.

We prayed and I went back and forth some (I've been known to struggle with the unknown at times :), but in the end we decided that this was the little one that God had in mind for us when we started this crazy process a year ago and on September 26th we officially accepted the referral. I should not here that I don't think Jason ever had any doubts or reservations. He is the most loving and faithful man and I am so blessed to call him my husband.  On September 30th our agency submitted our official letter requesting approval to adopt him (LOI) to China.

At this point families adopting from China begin the excruciating wait for LOA (letter of approval) from China which can take anywhere from 6 weeks to well over 3 months. We were praying that since we had been logged in for so long that our dossier had already been translated and reviewed and we would therefore have a very short wait for LOA.

Our prayers were answered today when we learned that we have been approved and that the hard copy of our LOA will be issued tomorrow! We are so excited and are hoping to travel in the next 8-12 weeks. We will share pictures (and his name) soon and will keep everyone posted on prayer requests and dates. (Oh, and I almost forgot to update that the 'story' I alluded to here was not the story God had for us and He has made that even more clear since we accepted the referral for Justin. I love how God works everything out so perfectly!)

Thank you all for praying and for all the love and support you've given us over the past year. We can't wait to introduce you all to our new son!

New blog name coming soon too! ;)

P.S. Don't forget to do all of your Christmas shopping on Amazon using our fundraising link in the left side bar :)

A Teeny Tiny One

So, I didn't blog much this summer. It is because we have had a super busy summer but also because I couldn't write about this right away. I needed some distance from it and I actually started this post months ago, but just recently finished it so I could post it.

On a Thursday afternoon in early June my phone rang and the caller ID said 'DJFS' (Department of Job and Family Services) and I swallowed hard. My caller ID has not said 'DJFS' for over a year and in many ways I was glad of that. We are in the middle of trying to adopt from China, we still babysit every week for our first foster baby J, our summer has been crazy, etc. For a split second I considered not answering, but curiosity (which we all know killed the cat) got the better of me.

The social worker on the other end of the line told me that they had a newborn who needed temporary placement for about 10 days starting tomorrow and asked if we would take her. Since she had me at the word newborn I said yes immediately, and I called Jason right away and told him. I was excited because this was a newborn, and it was only temporary, and I knew everything up front so it should be so much easier, and this would be a nice distraction from the adoption waiting, and the kids would love a newborn, and on and on.

That night when I got home I started getting things ready, dragging baby stuff out of the crawl space, setting up the pack 'n play, stopping at Walmart to get a few things, and basically running around like a chicken with my head cut off. I worried over what to do with the baby Friday night when Jordan had her drama camp performance and finally decided to just take her with us.

Friday morning I rush around running errands and trying to get everything done before the baby arrives and at lunch my phone rings and it is DJFS. I answer expecting the social worker to tell me what time they will be bringing the baby, but instead she says that other arrangements have been made for the baby and they don't need us to take her. I am really disappointed, but I say OK and work on getting over it. I continue with the rest of my day until my phone rings again at about 3:30pm and I see DJFS on the caller ID. I feel a little spark of hope. The social worker tells me that the other arrangements are not going to work and asks if we can take the baby after all. I say yes and she says she will be there with the baby hopefully within the hour.

A little while later the social worker arrives with a sweet and tiny baby who is just over a week old. My niece was a tiny 5 pounds and this little one is about the same. I should have known right then that baby A would steal my heart, but I still thought that since I knew up front that it was only temporary that somehow it would make things easier.

Baby A is a little darling and such a good baby. The kids become smitten with her and can't stop talking about how cute she is, how soft her hair is, and how fun it is having a baby. They ask lots of questions and are all super helpers, and even though I know better I start hoping and dreaming impossible scenarios.

But the day of her departure is quickly approaching and I try to keep reminding them that we will only have her for a few more days. I don't know the exact day she will be leaving, but I do know that it will be within the next 1-2 days. Day 1 comes and goes with no call and we settle in for the night. Day 2 dawns and by lunch I still have not heard anything and I begin to hope a little more. Then, a couple of hours later the phone rings and it is DJFS and my heart sinks. I answer and the social worker tells me that they are ready for the baby, but that she is leaving work early that day and could I bring the baby to the DJFS offices right then. It takes every ounce of strength I have to say yes and then I hang up. I say a quick prayer, "Lord, I need you now," get the baby in the car seat, gather her things, and load her and Jordan into the van. On the drive to JFS I call Jason and ask him to pick Corinne up from camp (Carson is at another camp) because with this extra stop I won't make it there in time.

I fight tears the whole way and when we arrive at DJFS and I open the door to get her out I start sobbing and that gets Jordan crying as well. I try to say something encouraging for Jordan and work at reigning in my emotions. We head into the office and I go up to the window to have them tell the caseworker we are there. The receptionist takes one look at my face and immediately her face softens and I can see sympathy in her eyes. The CW comes out with a car seat, looks at me, and gives me a pat on the back. I busy myself with getting baby A into the car seat and babble to try to keep myself under control. But it doesn't work and by the time I have her in the seat I am crying. The nice receptionist brings me out a tissue and Jordan and I high tail it out of there.

I manage to push my emotions down through meeting Jason to get Corinne, picking up Carson at camp, and driving home. Once we get home though I am a ball of raw emotions and I send the kids downstairs to watch a movie while I start throwing/slamming baby items into trash bags, tubs, anything I can get my hands on to get the stuff out of my sight. The stuff that is ripping my heart out - again. I'm not proud of how angry I was, but I'm being real here people. Being a foster parent is HARD and it is not for the faint of heart. I know in my head all the reasons good foster parents are needed and I've said the Matthew 25:40 verse to myself at least a thousand times, but it doesn't make the heart wrenching part any easier. It doesn't make the frustration with a broken system any easier to deal with and work within. Good foster parents love their foster children and when they have to say goodbye it tears their hearts out! But what does make it worth it is knowing that you have given a child love and a family when they needed it most, and you can't put a price on love. Love is always worth it 'even when it hurts, even when its hard, even when it all just falls apart' (lyrics from Steady My Heart by Kari Jobe); just ask our Heavenly Father who "loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life" (John 3:16).  It is hard every single time, but I can honestly say that I have learned something about myself, God, and love every time.

 

Waiting

 

 

In recent posts we established that I am not good at waiting nor do I like to wait (who does?). Once I make up my mind on something I am focused on it at full speed ahead. Well, this mindset or personality trait (or whatever you want to call), is not conducive to the international adoption process because that process is all about waiting (and paperwork).  Lots and lots of waiting. I actually sent Jason a text not long ago that says, "I don't think I am cut out for this," and by 'this', I mean waiting (and being patience).

I know that God is in control and that everything is in His time, but that doesn't always make the waiting easier. Lately I have been trying to put the adoption waiting at the back of my mind and focus on the here and now, but it is so hard! So, I decided to do a little study on waiting and share some of what I learned (I actually did this study a few months ago, but am just now getting around to posting it).
 

Waiting requires the passage of time (which is of course the hard part), but when I read this I immediately had the thought that the passage of time is necessary because it is during that time of waiting God is working and fulfilling His plans. God's timing is perfect and He will accomplish the plans He has laid out, but it will be in His time, not ours. It reminds us that God is in control, and although it is hard for a control freak like me I should really see it as an amazing source of peace and comfort because I know that if I were in control (and I admit that at times I slip into thinking that I am) I would completely botch everything. I would much rather have our perfect, loving, all mighty Father in control. 

 

All of this reminded me of one of my favorite songs Sovereign Over Us by Aaron Keys:

'You are working in our waiting,

Sanctifying us

When beyond our understanding

You're teaching us to trust'

Ahh, there it is...trust. Waiting is God asking us if we trust Him. Do we trust Him even when we can't see what He is doing? When we have no idea of His timetable? It is in the waiting that He is teaching us--to trust Him, to follow Him, that He is in complete control, and that though we can't see it He has a perfect plan. It is hard at times, but I know that trusting God and waiting on His timing will be so very worth it. So I will keep waiting...and trusting....

"If any are inclined to despond, because they do not have such patience, let them be of good courage. It is in the course of our feeble and very imperfect waiting that God Himself, by His hidden power, strengthens us and works out in us the patience of the great saints, the patience of Christ Himself."
– Andrew Murray

 

A Year Ago {Adoption Update}

Last year at this time God lead us to the decision to pursue international adoption, and we started researching agencies, talked to other adoptive families, chose China, applied to our agency, and took our first steps on this journey. I never dreamed that my adoption update blog post a year later would be: still waiting. I honestly believed our one year update would include a picture of our soon to be child (referred and approved by China) and the news that we were making travel plans, but instead our update is that we are still waiting on a referral. All systems have been go for a referral since April when our dossier was logged in at the CCCWA in China, but so far we have not gotten the call that we have been waiting for. And the waiting, oh the waiting, it has been hard - really hard (and I do have a post on waiting that I hope to put the finishing touches on this weekend so I can finally publish it).

There is a bit of a story that goes along with all the waiting (a few of you know it as you have faithfully prayed with us), but I'm not ready to share it here just now because, well, I don't know how the story ends yet. If it ends the way we have been praying then it will be a true God story and an undeniable miracle! But even if it doesn't end the way we are hoping we know that God has a story just as wonderful and amazing in store for us.

Please continue to pray for us and for our future little one waiting in China. Pray for patience in the waiting and for trust that God has a plan far greater than anything we could hope or imagine. Pray that I will have occasion to post another adoption update very soon :) 

Let me hear in the morning of your steadfast love, for in you I trust. Make me know the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul. ~Psalm 143:8

Flying

Right now Carson absolutely adores planes and flying. He loves all planes, but his favorites are the F-16, the Hawker Hurricane, and the Spitfire. Earlier this year Jason and Carson went back to the Air Force Museum in Dayton, which he loved, and then back in May a friend who has her pilot's license took the kids and I flying in a Cessna 172. Needless to say Carson was in seventh heaven!

 

 

 

 

July Birthday Girl

In July we celebrated this little one's birthday, and although she is not so little any more she will always be my baby. Our sweet Corinne turned 6 and will be starting first grade this fall which has left me wondering where the years go.

Our little cutie had several birthday celebrations the first of which was the week before her bday and involved painting pottery with her BFF, Sasha (who moved to Indiana earlier this year - Corinne misses her terribly). We followed up the painting with lunch at Cici's Pizza.

  

The following week on her actual bday we made our first visit to the American Girl store at Easton in Columbus. The girls were in heaven and had fun shopping (Corinne with a gift card and bday money and Jordan with money she had saved). Then we headed to the Lego store across the street so Carson could spend some money he had saved, and then headed to California Pizza Kitchen for lunch where the girls were beyond excited to discover that the restaurant has AG doll high chairs.

 

We finished out our multi-week celebration with two family parities with all of the grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

We are so blessed to have Corinne as part of our family and had a blast celebrating her birthday!

Steady My Heart

I've needed this song many times during the past week and a half:

Thoughtful Thursday

The pathway is broken and the signs are unclear
And I don't know the reasons why You brought me here.
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley if You want me to.
Cause I'm not who I was when I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You’re not through with me yet.
So if all of these trials bring me closer to You
Then I will go through the fire if You want me to.

~Ginny Owens

Building & Dancing

A few of our favorite things.

Carson - our Lego loving builder!

An aircraft of his own design that he named the American Laser Beam. 

Lego class that our homeschool group did with Bricks4Kidz.

Jordan - our beautiful dancer!

Pictures from her dance recital last month with Vitoria Dance Company.

Ballet

Contemporary/Lyrical

Thoughtful Thursday

It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.

~Deuteronomy 31:8

Help Me Find It

My new favorite song!! Love it!

Spring in Pictures

Getting outside to play

Easter

Ice skating

PCC Walk4Life fundraiser

For the Love of Airplanes

In February Jason and Carson took a field trip to the National Museum of the US Air Force because Carson absolutely LOVES planes and specifically military planes (we went as a family last year).

This is Carson's favorite plane - the Spitfire

Another favorite - the Thunderbird

Trying out the cockpit

I think we may have future pilot on our hands!